( (¯`·._Life_.·´¯))

College life is like Reliance !!
" Karlo Duniya Mutthi Mein"
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ======

Bachelor Life is Like Airtel!!
" Aisi Azadi aur Kahaan"
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ======
After Engagement is Like Idea!!
" Jo Badal de aapki Zindagi"
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ======
After Marriage is like Hutch!!
" Wherever U go.. the network Follows"
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ======
After Kid(s), it's like BSNL!!
" All lines are Busy"

---

 Sean Pun

Butwal, Nepal

 

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( (¯`·._Touching Story_.·´¯))

Love and care for the one you love every single days of your life. You may think what you did is just a
small deed, but to that someone, it may mean a lot. Have a nice day everyone! May this story inspire you
in any way!

I was born in a secluded village on a mountain. Day by day, my parents ploughed the yellow dry soil

with their backs towards the sky.

I have a brother who is 3 years younger than me. I wanted to buy a handkerchief, which all girls around me seemed to have. So, one day

I stole 50 cents from my father's drawer. Father had discovered about the stolen money right away.

He made me and my younger brother kneel against the wall as he held a bamboo stick in his hand.

"Who stole the money?" he asked. I was stunned, too afraid to talk. Neither of us

admitted to the fault, so he said, "Fine, if nobody wants to admit, you two should be beaten!"

He lifted up the bamboo stick.

Suddenly, my younger brother gripped father's hand and said," Dad, I was the one who did it!"

The long stick smacked my brother's back repeatedly. Father was so angry that he kept on whipping my brother until he lost his breath.

After that, he sat down on our stone bed and scolded  my brother, "You have learned to steal from your own house now. What other

embarrassing things will you be possibly doing in the future? You should be beaten to death, you shameless thief!"

That night, my mother and I hugged my brother. His body was full of wounds from the beating but he never shed a single tear.

In the middle of the night, all of sudden, I cried out loudly. My brother covered my mouth with his little hand and said, " Sis, now

don't cry anymore. Everything has happened." I still hate myself for not having enough courage to admit what I did.

Years gone by, but the incident still seemed like it just happened yesterday. I will never forget my brother's ___expression when he protected me.

That year, my brother was 8 years old and I was 11 years old. When my brother was in his last year of secondary school, he was accepted

in an upper secondary school in the central. At the same time, I was accepted into a university in the province. That night, father

squatted in the yard, smoking, packet by packet.

I could hear him ask my mother, "Both of our children, they have good results? very good results?"

Mother wiped off her tears and sighed," What is the use? How can we possibly finance both of them?"

At that time, my brother walked out, he stood in front of father and said,"Dad, I don't want to continue my study anymore, I have read enough books."

Father swung his hand and slapped my brother on his face. "Why do you have a spirit so damn weak? Even if it means I have to beg for money on the streets, I will send you two to school until you have both finished your study!" And then, he started to knock on every house in the village to borrow money.

I stuck out my hand as gently as I can to my brother's swollen face, and told him, "A boy has to continue his study; If not, he will not be able to overcome this poverty we are experiencing. "

I, on the other hand, had decided not to further my study at the university. Nobody knew that on the next day, before dawn, my brother left the house with a few pieces of worn-out  clothes and a few dry beans. He sneaked to my side of the bed and left a note on my pillow; "Sis, getting into a university is not easy. I will go find a job and I will send money to you." I held the note while sitting on my bed, and cried until I lost my voice.

That year, my brother was 17 years old; I was 20 years old. With the money father borrowed from the whole village, and the money my brother earned from carrying cement on his back at a construction site, finally, I managed to get to the third year of my study in the  university.

One day, while I was studying in my room, my roommate came in and told me,"There's a villager waiting for

you outside!" Why would there be a villager looking for me? I walked out, and I saw my brother from afar. His whole body

was covered with dirt, dust, cement and sand. I asked  him, "Why did you not tell my roommate that you are my brother?"

He replied with a smile," Look at my appearance. What will they think if they would know that I am your

brother? Won't they laugh at you?" I felt so touched, and tears filled my eyes. I swept away dirt and dust from my brother's body. And told

him with a lump in my throat, " I don't care what  people would say! You are my brother no matter what

your appearance is?"

From his pocket, he took out a butterfly hair clip. He  put it on my hair and said, "I saw all the girls in

town are wearing it. So, I think you should also have one." I could not hold back myself anymore. I pulled my brother into my arms and cried.

That year, my brother was 20 years old; I was 23 years old. I noticed that the broken window was repaired the first time I brought my boyfriend home. The house was scrubbed cleaned.

After my boyfriend left, I danced like a little girl in front of my mother, "Mom, you didn't have to spend so much time cleaning the house!" But she told me with a smile," It was your brother who went home early to clean the house. Didn't you see the wound on his hand? He hurt his hand while he was replacing the window."

I went into my brother's bedroom. Looking at his thin face, I felt like there are hundreds of needle pricked in my heart.

I applied some ointment on his wound and put a bandage on it, "Does it hurt? " I asked him.

"No, it doesn't hurt. You know, when at the construction site, stones keep falling on my feet .

Even that could not stop me from working." In the middle of the sentence, he stopped. I turned my

back on him and tears rolled down my face.

That year, my brother was 23 years old; I was 26 years old.

After I got married, I lived in the city. Many times my husband invited my parents to come and live with us, but they didn't want.

They said, once they left the village, they wouldn't know what to do.

My brother agreed with them. He said, "Sis, you just take care of your parents-in-law. I will take care of mom and dad here."

My husband became the director of his factory. We asked my brother to accept the offer of being the

manager in the maintenance department. But my brother rejected the offer. He insisted on working as a repairman instead for a start.

One day, my brother was on the top of a ladder repairing a cable, when he got electrocuted, and was

sent to the hospital. My husband and I visited him at the hospital. Looking at the white gypsum on his leg, I grumbled, "Why did

you reject the offer of being a manager? Managers won't do something dangerous like that. Now look at

you, You ar suffering a serious injury. Why didn't you just listen to us?"

With a serious ___expression on his face, he defended his decision, "Think of brother-in-law. He just

became the director, and I being uneducated, and would become a manager, what kind of rumors would fly

around?" My husband's eyes filled up with tears, and then I  said, "But you lack in education only because of me!"

"Why do you talk about the past?" he said and then he held my hand.

That year, he was 26 years old and I was 29 years old. My brother was 30 years old when he married a farmer

girl from the village.

During the wedding reception, the master of ceremonies asked him, "Who is the one person you respect and love

the most?" Without even taking a time to think, he answered," My sister." He continued by telling a story I could not

even remember.

"When I was in primary school, the school was in a different village. Everyday, my sister and I would

walk for 2 hours to school and back home. One day, I lost the other pair of my gloves. My sister gave me

one of hers.
She wore only one glove and she had to walk far. When we got home, her hands were trembling because of the
cold weather that she could not even hold her chopsticks. >From that day on, I swore that as long as
I live, I would take care of my sister and will always be good to her." Applause filled up the room. All guests turned their
attention to me. I found it hard to speak, "In my whole life, the one I would like to thank most is my brother," And in this
happy occasion, in front of the crowd, tears were rolling down my face again.

Love and care for the one you love every single days of your life. You may think what you did is just a
small deed, but to that someone, it may mean a lot. Have a nice day everyone! May this story inspire you
in any way!

May Your Day be Filled with Everything Good...

Live simply... Love generously.. . Care deeply...Speak kindly...

Leave the rest to God.

---

 Sean Pun

Butwal, Nepal

.

Angel

Angels Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guestroom. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement.  As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied, "Things aren't always what they seem". The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife.  After sharing what little food they had the, couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.  The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel "how could you have let this happen! The first man had everything, yet you helped him," she accused.  "The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let their cow die."  "Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall.  Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife.  I gave her the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem." Sometimes this is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later. Think about this: Should you find it hard to get to sleep tonight, just remember the homeless family who has no bed to lie in. Should you find yourself stuck in traffic, don't despair.  There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard-of privilege. Should you have a bad day at work, think of the man who has been out of work for the last three months. Should you despair over a relationship gone bad, think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return. Should you grieve the passing of another weekend, think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week, for -15.00 to feed her family. Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance, think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk. Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror,  think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine. Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking, "what is my purpose?," be thankful. There are those who didn't live long enough to  get the opportunity.  Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities, remember, things could be worse--you could be them! Should you decide to send this to a friend, you might brighten someone's day!                                        Forward this mail to all your relatives & friends. Have them join the group.                               Sean Pun Butwal, Nepal

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L * O * V * E.....Beautiful Quotes

You say that love is nonsense.... I tell you it is no such thing.  For weeks and months it is a steady physical pain, an ache about the heart,  never leaving one, by night or by day; a long strain on one's  nerves like toothache or rheumatism, not intolerable at any one instant,  but exhausting by its steady drain on the strength. * Henry Adams* Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator,  but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make laugh. * W. H. Auden* Sympathy constitutes friendship; but in love there is a sort of antipathy,  or opposing passion. Each strives to be the other,  and both together make up one whole. * Samuel Taylor Coleridge* When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions May wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams As the north wind lays waste the garden. For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth So is he for your pruning. The Prophet by Gibran Khalil Gibran   Love, with very young people, is a heartless business.  We drink at that age from thirst, or to get drunk;  it is only later in life that we occupy ourselves with the  individuality of our wine. * Isak Dinesen* Love must not touch the marrow of the soul. Our affections must be breakable chains that we can cast them off or tighten them. * Euripedes* Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists...  When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the  other half of ourselves. We are incomplete like a book in  two volumes of which the first has been lost.  That is what I imagine love to be: incompleteness  in absence * Romeo Bagga* No matter what you've done for yourself or for humanity,  if you can't look back on having given love and attention to  your own family, what have you really accomplished? * Lee Iacocca* This was love at first sight, love everlasting: a feeling unknown,  unhoped for, unexpected-- in so far as it could be a matter of  conscious awareness; it took entire possession of him,  and he understood, with joyous amazement,  that this was for life. * Thomas Mann* A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species  of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled,  but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy. * George Jean Nathan* We conceal it from ourselves in vain--we must always love something..  In those matters seemingly removed from love, the feeling is  secretly to be found, and man cannot possibly  live for a moment without it. * Blaise Pascal* Love is something far more than desire for sexual intercourse;  it is the principal means of escape from the loneliness  which afflicts most men and women throughout  the greater part of their lives. * Bertrand Russell* Love has features which pierce all hearts, he wears a bandage  which conceals the faults of those beloved. He has wings,  he comes quickly and flies away the same. * Voltaire* Love is always bestowed as a gift - freely, willingly and  without expectation. We don't love to be loved; we love to love. *Leo Buscaglia*  Sean Pun Butwal, Nepal

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( (¯`·._a year love story_.·´¯))

---

In my heart when you made first entry
It was holiday and month was January

You met again in the month of February
along with u, you had ur friend Jai

We used to meet and loved to sing
The month was March, and it was spring

For life, we will hold this engagement
on April 1st, we signed the Agreement

Our Love was growing more glorious
but in May, we became notorious

We could not meet, it was our fortune
We realized this in the month of June

Our Birds of hope began to fly
We lost all hope in the month of July

In August, everything turned upside down
and Titanic of our love began to drown

In September, the worst was seen
you were engaged with Mr. Raj

For me, you heart signaled no Entry
and October passed as a century

In November Raj
got Victory
and I sent my love to cemetery

In  December, you depart on marriage train
and in coming month I will try again....... . ..
 Sean Pun

Butwal, Nepal

राष्ट्रपति

अर्पण तामाङ , एउटा राष्žट्रपतिमा एउटा राष्žट्रपतिमा देश फेरि अल्žझदैछ एउटै उदेश्žय बोकेका गणतन्žत्रका ! तर यात्रा अलग लिएका !! छलफल मै ब्žयस्žत एउटै बिमतीमा त्žयही त देश डुब्žदैछ आज ! एउटै शवाल राष्žट्रपतिमा !!! २०६५जेठको मध्žयानतर हुदै गर्दा १५ गतेको रापिलो घामको झुल्žको सँगै गणतन्žत्रको भाले नयाँ बानेश्žवरमा कुखुरी काँ..गरेर बास्žतै गर्दा एउटा ईतिहाँसको नयाँ पाना पल्žटदै गर्दा नयाँ युगले बामे नसर्दै ! निरुङ्कुस्žताको श्रीपेच भूइमा नझर्दै कोकोहाल मच्žचिदै थियो नयाँ बानेश्žवरमा एउटा राष्žट्रपतिमा !!! तँ लाई म लाई तँछाड मछाडमा गणितिय अँकको जोड घटाउ सँगै देश फेरि कंहि अल्žझिदैछ नयाँ नेपालको नेता हरु सँगै कान्žछो गणतन्žत्रको ! प्रथम राष्žट्रपति बन्žने होडबाजीमा जनता फेरि अन्žयोलमा फँस्žदैछ एउटा राष्žट्रपतिमा !!! हाँसपोसा-२तरहरा-सुनसरी, हाल-दोहा कतार !

Ghazal

नकोरी कनै त्यो सलाई तिमीले ।

मिटायौ चिठी सब् जलाई तिमीले ।।

म आफु विरोधी कठोरै बनेथें,

पगाल्यौ फतक्कै गलाई तिमीले ।

अकेला बनायौ र छाडेर हिँड्यौ,

भरोसा सुटूक्कै ढलाई तिमीले ।

कि फेरी बहाना अनौंठो गरायौ,

र आँखा सबैको छलाई तिमीले ।

नसोधे हुने भो गिरायौ कसोरी ?

सबैको नजरमा मलाई तिमीले ।

Regards,

binitsanu

7/1 Green Street

Kogarah 2217

NSW, Sydney

!!! Cancer prevention !!!

CANCER PREVENTION UPDATE AFTER YEARS OF TELLING PEOPLE CHEMOTHERAPY IS THE ONLY WAY TO TRY (TRY THE KEY WORD) AND ELIMINATE CANCER, JOHNHOPKINS HOSPITAL (IN USA ) IS FINALLY STARTING TO TELL YOU THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY . 1. Every person has cancer cells in the body.These cancer cells do not show up in the standard tests until they have multiplied to a few billion. When doctors tell cancer patients that there are no more cancer cells in their bodies after treatment, it just means the tests are unable to detect the cancer cells because they have not reached the detectable size. 2. Cancer cells occur between 6 to more than 10 times in a person's lifetime. 3. When the person's immune system is strong the cancer cells will be destroyed and prevented from multiplying and forming tumors. 4. When a person has cancer it indicates the person has multiple nutritional deficiencies. These could be due to genetic, environmental, food and lifestyle factors. 5. To overcome the multiple nutritional deficiencies, changing diet and including supplements will strengthen the immune system. 6. Chemotherapy involves poisoning the rapidly growing cancer cells and also destroys rapidly-growing healthy cells in the bone marrow, gastro-intestinal tract etc, and can cause organ damage, like liver, kidneys, heart, lungs etc. 7. Radiation while destroying cancer cells also burns, scars and damages healthy cells, tissues and organs.. 8. Initial treatment with chemotherapy and radiation will often reduce tumor size. However prolonged use of chemotherapy and radiation do not result in more tumor destruction. 9. When the body has too much toxic burden from chemotherapy and radiation the immune system is either compromised or destroyed, hence the person can succumb to various kinds of infections and complications. 10. Chemotherapy and radiation can cause cancer cells to mutate and become resistant and difficult to destroy. Surgery can also cause cancer cells to spread to other sites. 11. An effective way to battle cancer is to starve the cancer cells by not feeding it with the foods it needs to multiply. CANCER CELLS FEED ON: a. Sugar , is a cancer-feeder. By cutting off sugar it cuts off one important food supply to the cancer cells. Sugar substitutes like Nutrasweet, Equal, Spoonful, etc are made with Aspartame and it is harmful. A better natural substitute would be Manuka honey or molasses but only in very small amounts. Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in colour. Better alternative is Bragg's aminos or sea salt. ( THE WEST MADE US 2 CHANGE FROM SEA 2 WHITE IODISED SALT ) b. Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the gastro-intestinal tract. Cancer feeds on mucus .. By cutting off milk and substituting with unsweetened soya milk cancer cells are being starved. c. Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment . A meat-based diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little chicken rather than beef or pork. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful,especially to people with cancer. d. A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole grains, seeds, nuts and a little fruits help put the body into an alkaline environment . About 20% can be from cooked food including beans. Fresh vegetable juices provide live enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to cellular levels within 15 minutes to nourish and enhance growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building healthy cells try and drink fresh vegetable juice (most vegetables including bean sprouts) and eat some raw vegetables 2 or 3 times a day.. Enzymes are destroyed at temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C). e. Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate, which have high caffeine . Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer-fighting properties . Water- best to drink purified water, or filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap water. Distilled water is acidic, avoid it. 12. Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of digestive enzymes. Undigested meat remaining in the intestines become putrified and leads to more toxic buildup. 13. Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. By refraining from or eating less meat it frees more enzymes to attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the body's killer cells to destroy the cancer cells. 14. Some supplements build up the immune system (IP6, Flor ssence,Essiac, anti-oxidants, vitamins,minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the body's own killer cells to destroy cancer cells. Other supplements like vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death, the body's normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells. 15. Cancer is a disease of the mind,body, and spirit. A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior be a survivor. Anger, un forgiveness and bitterness put the body into a stressful and acidic environment . Learn to have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life. 16. Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated environment. . Exercising daily, and deep breathing help to get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells. PLEASE READ ON 1. No plastic containers in micro. 2. No water bottles in freezer. 3. No plastic wrap in microwave.  This is an article that should be sent to all in your life.    Sean Pun Butwal, Nepal

.

°l||l° H.I.V facts°l||l°

H I V

~*~ Facts ~*~ 

 
 

·         HIV can never survive in any other liquid* medium also other than blood or semen (& please for God sake ... never in Pani Puri wala pani)

·         Even if one drinks an HIV infected blood (or semen) of someone (ingest through Gastro Intestinal track), the virus can not survive in the acidic pH of stomach*. Highest extent of acidity is 0 (practically not possible) so imagine 1 as pH which is in our stomach. (This pH can burn your own finger in less than a second if you dip in that acid).

·         Exposure of less than 1 second in AIR KILLS the HIV virus* (hence story of needle pricks in Cinema theatres is a crap). Even if blood from a wound (of infected person) dries up (*blood clot*), *the virus dies*and can not infect anyone else

·         HIV transmission is *ONLY* an *INFECTION* i.e. entrance of virus in one's body. It *DOES NOT MEAN AIDS*.

·         An HIV-infected person (after entrance of virus) can progress to a condition of AIDS only after *8 to 10 YEARS *(not in 15 days as in the Pani Puri story)

·         It is *not HIV (virus) that kills a human* .....the virus attacks immune cells (cells that fight against foreign pathogens/antigens) and hence a person's ability to fight against infections & diseases slowly diminishes and person ultimately dies of a disease which could be as simple as TB

·         Most importantly, HIV is no longer a dreadful disease ... it is "*CHRONIC MANAGEABLE DISEASE*" just like Diabetes or Hypertension.

·         If there is anything you need to be careful from to prevent HIV is Unsafe sex*, *Blood transfusion* (check before taking) /Blood donation (use sterilized needles only) and any *blood contact during an accident *or so where amount of bleeding is very high.

sent by:

 Sean Pun

Butwal, Nepal

How to Find A Life Partner? & How to be a good BF + many more

Golden Rules for Finding Your Life Partner -

by Dov Heller, M.A.

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50%, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Miss. Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love"; I believe this is the ..1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound "not politically correct", there's a profound truth here.

Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: "You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone"; You need a lot more!

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

Question - 1: Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose.

Two things can happen in a marriage:

1. You can grow together, or
2. You can grow apart.

50% of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life!

Bottom line - Marry someone who wants the same thing.

Question - 2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?

This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get "punished"; or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

Question - 3: Is he/she a mensch?

A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right ";. So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world -

1. People who are dedicated to personal growth and
2. People who are dedicated to seeking comfort.

Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

Question - 4: How does he/she treat other people?

The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure.

Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self- absorbed?

To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as waiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc.. How do they treat their parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation?

If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything; can you do nearly as much for them? You can be sure that someone, who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

Question - 5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?

Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve"; them after they're married. As a colleague of mine puts it: "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage for the worse" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself trouble because you didn't do your homework.

Another Perspective -

There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you.

Pay Attention -

• Which ones lift and which ones lean?
• Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
• Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
• When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?
• Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye"; Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important.

• Do you bring out the best in each other?
• Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control?
• What do you bring to the relationship?
• Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain?
• You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay.

If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS -

1. Trust
2. Communication
3. Intimacy
4. A Sense of Humor
5. Sharing Tasks
6. Some get away time without Business or Children.
7. Daily Exchanges (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes, etc.)
8. Sharing Common Goals & Interests.
9. Giving each other space to grow without feeling Insecure.
10. Giving each other a sense of Belonging & Assurances of Commitment.

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty; and pain will replace.

• Life starts with a Voice but ends with Silence
• Love starts with a Fear but ends with Tears
• Friendship starts Anywhere and ends Nowhere.

How to be a good BF

- How to be a Good boy friend -

Getting a girlfriend isn't so hard, but keeping one is. To be a good boyfriend, you have to have good relationship skills. You have to be willing to make sacrifices for the woman that you are with, and you have to be trustworthy. Your priority should be making your girlfriend happy. Here are some tips for being the best boyfriend you can be:

• ONLY THE HONEST WILL SURVIVE
  Obviously, a good boyfriend does not cheat on his girlfriend. That's a pretty basic rule, but it is also very important that you remember not to break it. Some men feel that being in a monogamous relationship is extremely difficult. Men are praised by society and the media when they're able to be with multiple women at one time – they are fondly referred to as "players" and "ladies men." And women, on the other hand, are labeled "sluts" and "whores." It is a complete double standard. Either a man or woman is in the wrong if they decide to be unfaithful to their relationship. Cheating is wrong, it is hurtful, and it is detrimental to trust. If you cheat on your girlfriend, she's going to have a very hard time forgiving you. If she does forgive you, she is always going to have a very hard time trust in you. It will almost certainly ruin your relationship. The foundation of a healthy relationship has to be trust, and without it, a relationship cannot thrive. If you don't think that you are going to be able to resist the temptation of sleeping with other women when you are in a relationship with one woman, then you need to get out of the relationship. Sneaking around, even if you don't think that you're going to get caught, is very wrong. Do not try to convince yourself that the occasional non-emotional fling is acceptable male behavior. One night stands still absolutely constitute infidelity. Think about it this way: how would you feel if you were to discover that your girlfriend had a one night stand on her girls' night out? If you are mature enough to be in a relationship, then you are mature enough to be faithful to your lady. While cheating is a major league form of lying, almost any type of dishonesty is unacceptable if you are trying to be a good boyfriend. The one question that you should always say 'no' to regardless of your honest opinion: "Does this outfit make me look fat?"

• BE ROMANTIC
  If you believe that chivalry is dead, then you are not on the path to becoming a good boyfriend. You have to be romantic, sweet, and thoughtful to your girlfriend. You have to come up with creative ways to show her how much you love her and how much you care. Even after the two of you have been together for an extended period of time, you still have to take her out on dates – wine and dine her. Don't forget to tell her how beautiful you think she is – believe me, she will never get sick of hearing it. Open the car door for her – it's not old fashioned, it's being a good boyfriend. Leave romantic notes for her, get her flowers for no particular occasion, or call her at work just to tell her that you are thinking about or that you're looking for to seeing her later today. You have to continuously show her how much she means to you – you cannot take her love for granted. Keeping the romance alive is an integral part of being a good boyfriend.
• GET INTERESTED
  Generally speaking, women talk a lot more than men do. They talk about their feelings, and they want you to talk about yours. While you might not find the subjects incredibly interesting, they are incredibly important to your relationship, and you need to realize that. When your girlfriend wants to talk to you about something, you have to listen. And not only do you have to listen, but you have to be an active participant in the conversation – monosyllabic answers are not good boyfriend material. When she asks you what your feelings are about a particular issue, tell her. Don't say "I don't know" and never respond with an unintelligible grunt. Just tell her, honestly, how you feel. When the two of you are out shopping and she is trying on outfits, try to get interested. When she is telling you about her friends, get interested. If something is important to her, it should be important to you. Plus, if you pay attention to the things that are important to her, she will do the same for you. A good relationship is a give and take, and to be a good boyfriend you'll have to give as much as you are planning to take.

• SEND FLOWERS AND GIFTS
  Apart from all above tips, girls always welcome flowers and gifts on different occasions even if there is no special occasion. A red rose is still what your girl friend loves. Flowers represents and express feelings in the variety of ways by sending different combinations of bouquet. You may want to acquaint with the colors and combination of roses to send.

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Good Relationship

- 10 Ways to Build a Good Relationship -

• BE A MAN OF YOUR WORD
  A successful and strong relationship is one that is built on trust and dependability. If you tell a woman that you are going to do something, she will expect you to keep that commitment. Whether it's a date you've made for dinner, a promise to water her plants while she's on vacation, or a resolution to give up smoking, keeping a pledge is crucial in developing and nurturing a solid foundation for the future. Even if it is something that seems insignificant to you in the big scheme of things (i.e., returning a library book for her on your way home from work), a succession of forgetful moments will diminish her faith in you. Accordingly, if every time you promise to do something triggers a reaction on her part to have a Plan B just in case, it is only a matter of time before she starts seeking out a new companion with a better track record for reliability. Never make a promise unless it is one that you know you can keep.
• SHOW HER RESPECT
  If you want to keep a special woman in your life, you need to not only let her know that you put her on a pedestal but that you are willing to defend her honor to be there. This means that you don't engage in gossip or divulge confidences, that you don't criticize or belittle her, and that your love life isn't an open book to anyone who's nosey. If up until now your priority has been to spend all your free hours with your football buddies, you may need to start rethinking your agenda. A woman who always takes second, third or last place to other relationships in your life isn't going to stay in the picture for very long. Showing respect also means fidelity to the relationship if you've both made a commitment to monogamy. If you can't stay faithful, you owe her the respect of freeing her to meet someone who will appreciate and honor the treasure that she is.
• LEAVE YOUR BAGGAGE AT THE DOOR
  The last thing a woman wants is a whiner who does nothing but bemoan the fact that all of her predecessors- -and probably life in general--treated him badly. While it's one thing for her to be initially sympathetic, it's draining to listen to the same sob stories day after day. Keep in mind that the more time you spend dwelling on the past, the less energy you'll have to spend building a new future. This also goes for men who talk incessantly about past relationships that were good. Whether the split came about as the result of death or divorce, women don't like to compete with the Ghosts of Relationships Past.
• ACCEPT HER AS SHE IS
  Maybe your beloved would look better if she lost a couple pounds. Maybe she should update that hairdo and go for something snazzier. Maybe she'd look better on your arm if she wore different clothes. If you find yourself keeping a list of all the things she should be doing, you may be looking for a makeover project instead of a girlfriend or future wife. What you need to ask yourself is whether your barrage of suggestions is really meant to help her or to reinvent her into someone who would better define who you think you are. Women--and men--want to know that they're loved for themselves, not for an idealistic image that may be difficult to obtain. There's a right way and a wrong way to recommend improvement. To imply that you could love her more if she didn't have quite so many flaws is definitely the wrong way.
• DON'T BE POSSESSIVE
  Do you call your girlfriend every hour of the day? Do you demand a thorough accounting of what she's doing and who she's seeing whenever she's not with you? Are you purposely driving a wedge between her and her family and friends so you won't have to share her? Do you discourage her from doing activities she really loves because you resent that you're not a part of it? If your behavior fits these descriptions, it's not love; it's obsession. In concert with the advice to treat your lady with proper respect, you need to allow her the freedom to have time to spend on herself. Jealousy and possessiveness are unhealthy in any relationship and communicate that you are insecure, clingy, and potentially violent if you're not the center of attention.
• DON'T RUSH ROMANCE
  If you want a strong love connection, you need to start out with an equally strong "like" connection. It's easy to rush headlong into a permanent relationship when you're more excited about the prospect of being half of a couple than in enjoying the journey of discovering the things you have in common. Even if you're sure that this is truly love at first sight and you don't want to waste any time getting her in bed or off to the altar, a partnership that is meant to last will have a better chance if the man and woman invest in the value of friendship with one another. Consider the qualities and traits you admire in the people to whom you are close and apply those same tests in picking the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life.
• PAY ATTENTION
  Being a good partner means being a conscientious listener. It means not talking about yourself so much that she can never get a word in edgewise. It means that when she hints she'd really like a certain sweater for her birthday you don't go out and buy her a CD of your favorite R&B singer instead. It also means that you're sensitive to her moods, that you take an interest in projects she's doing at work or problems she's currently having with her siblings, and that you actually notice (and take action) if you see that one of her tires is low or that she comments on a new restaurant she'd like to try. Pay attention to the calendar, too. Remembering birthdays, anniversaries and special occasions demonstrates that she's important enough to you that you know how to plan ahead.
• TRY NEW THINGS
  Show an open mind when it comes to trying out new foods, activities, or ideas. While the two of you don't have to share the same passion for every single thing that comes along, she's far more likely to accompany you to a monster truck rally someday if you've accompanied her to a performance of the ballet. The fact that you show the willingness and curiosity to see what something is about instead of flatly dismissing it as stupid will accrue huge points in the sensitivity department. Why? Men and women tend to interpret the rejection of an idea as a rejection of them personally, a condition that will only fester with the passage of time. It should also be understood between the two of you that if the new whatever isn't a good fit, it won't continue to linger as a bone of contention. Trying it once—and respecting the outcome— is the most that either of you can ask.
• SHARE THE WORK
  In today's society, there is no such thing as "a woman's job" or "a man's job." The fact that both parties put in a full day of work shouldn't mean that it's always the female's job to cook the meals, set the table, wash the dishes and do the laundry. You may not be a gourmet chef but that shouldn't stop you from picking up and dishing out Chinese food. Your gender also shouldn't inhibit you from running the vacuum cleaner, walking the dog, or helping put postage stamps on the wedding invitations.
• CELEBRATE THE ORDINARY
  Too many couples make the mistake of only pulling out all the stops for each other on vacations and special holidays. The rest of the time, they're taking each other for granted. While it's easy to say, "I love you" against an exotic backdrop or go overboard buying presents on Valentine's Day, a happy relationship is one that celebrates itself every day of the year. Buy her a card "just because." Schedule date nights…and keep them! Give her a foot rub when she's had a rough day. Bring her lunch in bed and a favorite DVD when she's under the weather. Let her know on a regular basis that she's not only the love of your life but also the best friend you could ever have. Most of all, remember that "happily ever after" isn't a destination but a journey to be taken hand in hand and heart to heart.

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10 Commandments

- 10 Commandments for the Adults -

This is Worth Reading over & over again followed by Course of Action

1. Face and accept the reality of getting old, its consequences and the limitations which growing old brings. Act and behave your age. Quit fooling yourself by trying to look like you were in your youth.
   
   
2. Focus on enjoying people, not on indulging in or accumulating material things.
   
   
3. Plan to spend whatever you have saved. You deserve to enjoy it and the few healthy years you have left. Travel if you can afford it. Don't leave anything for your children or loved ones to quarrel about. By leaving anything, you may even cause more trouble when you Are gone.
   
   
4. Live in the here and now, not in the yesterdays and tomorrows. It is only today that you can handle. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow may not even happen
   
   
5. Enjoy your grandchildren (if you are blessed with any) but don't be their full time baby sitter. You have no moral obligation to take care of them.
   
   Don't have any guilt about refusing to baby sit anyone's kids, including your own grandkids. Your parental obligation is to your children. After you have raised them into responsible adults, your duties of child-rearing and babysitting are finished. Let your children raise their own off-springs.
   
   
6. Accept physical weakness, sickness and other physical pains. It is a part of the aging process. Enjoy whatever your health can allow.
   
   
7. Enjoy what you are and what you have right now. Stop working hard for what you do not have. If you do not have them, it's probably too late.
   
   
8. Just enjoy your life with your spouse, children, grandchildren and friends. People, who truly love you, love you for yourself, not for what you have. Anyone who loves you for what you have will just give you misery.
   
   
9. Forgive and accept forgiveness. Forgive yourself and others. Enjoy peace of mind and peace of soul.
   
   
10. Befriend death. It's a natural part of the life cycle. Don't be afraid of it. Death is the beginning of a new and better life. So, prepare yourself not for death but for a new life.